Should You Pay For The First Date? YES!

Though we live in an age of equal opportunity it still pays to be a gentleman sometimes, especially when you start to date someone new. Even if she is well into feminism, as we all are, it is better to play safe and be the full on gentleman to start, and then tone things down as you get to know her better. One of the best examples of this is when it comes to paying on your first date. In these enlightened times, some people may think that you should split the bill, or even that she could pay for the meal. Personally, I think there is almost no point at which the woman should pay for the first date. Perhaps if she is some lonely widowed millionairess and you are the gardener she is trying to biff. But apart for that, get your wallet out.

paying on first date

Man pays on first date

First Impressions Count

The first date is all about sizing each other up and working out where you want the relationship to go. Is it going to end tonight with a simple handshake, tomorrow with breakfast, or do you see this as something long-term? You will be looking at her in terms of personality, looks and, yes, possible wealth. And she will be looking for the same things in you. If you chose to duck the check on the first date then the two signals this sends are cheapskate and broke. Neither are good for future fun. If you are incredibly charismatic, or very hot, you might still get something out of it, but nothing long-term. If you make this small gesture on the first date, it will show that you think she is worth it, which will put you high up in her rankings.

You Should Of Asked Her

The concept of whether the woman should pay can really only come up in one instance: if she asked you out on the date. Now hopefully this really should not have happened. If you liked her, you should have manned up and asked her yourself. If you didn’t do that, then chances are you have slipped down a notch or two in her estimation, and therefore paying for the date can help rectify that damage. If you don’t really like her, then why the hell are you there in the first place? Either you are too much of a wimp to say ‘no, sorry, I don’t see you that way’, or you are just out for a free night out and do expect her to pay, in which case you are a douche.


Sometimes, the old ways are the best. It is good to pay for the first date, just as it is good to open the door for her and treat her with respect. Your first date should be something special, not something where you are arguing over gender politics. Even if you expect her to pull her weight financially in the long term, these first few dates are the fairy tale and you should live up to being her prince.